The Other Life You Could Have Lived
The following is a copy of the Thomas Question email devotional. You can subscribe to the email edition from our website.
I apologize for the length as it’s a bit longer than I prefer, but it’s also something I feel very strongly about.
It’s easy to wonder why it seems like the path to inner significance is a different journey than the one that leads to outward acclaim. Why aren’t true hero’s making basketball-star-salaries (no offense to the basketball stars)?
It’s easy to wonder why these journeys seem so far apart because we long for them to be the same on such a deep level that it almost seems like we were made for them to be the same. We bandy the phrase, “that’s not fair” as though the very fabric of the universe was offended along with us. And it’s human nature that for as long as these two aspects are kept apart (inner significance and outer acclaim) that even after you’ve chosen one of these paths you may find yourself looking with longing at some aspect of the other journey you could have chosen. It seems like we’re doomed with the tendency to see greener grasses everywhere we look.
There was a man who touched on these issues when he said to Jesus in Luke 9.16, “‘I will follow you, Lord; but let me say farewell to those at my home’”. And Jesus’ reply can seem uncharacteristically firm: “No one who puts a hand to the plough and looks back is fit for the Kingdom of God.” Boom. There is no soft appeal clause at the end, no typical “grace” escape, just a difficult admission that the Kingdom does not include a place for “rear view mirror distractions”.
Do you look back? Do you look with longing on some aspects of the other life you could have chosen or could still choose again? I must admit this verse has terrified me for long phases of my journey with Christ. At times I’ve felt like I didn’t just look back, I stared back with intense longing. Not because I regretted anything about Jesus but because I think all of us are prone to the fantasy of “both”: that we could have Christ and the best parts of the other journey, too.
What we are experiencing is nothing more than Eden’s wound. Perfection occurs when we have the inner journey match outer acclaim, when true hero’s are also handsomely rewarded, when those “at the top” also deserve to be there. But that’s what we lost on the way out of the garden – the connection between the two. And for as long as we’re alive, those two paths will be far enough apart that one cannot adequately span the distance between them and keep “one foot on each”.
So I realized recently that heaven is what I really want – or at least the state we will be in once we get there.
I want those two things back in lock step where they belong: the inner and the outer. I want heaven – not the whispy clouds with harp strumming cherubs – I want the journey restored to it’s intended holistic state: work and reward put back in proper ratio’s. I want heaven – I just don’t know it as such. I want the thing twisted into the image of a BMW, a crisp suit and a look of importance, but I want it to be for real.
However, I’ve also come to realize that for as long as we’re alive, the image doesn’t contain what’s whispered in it, and image is our problem. We were made in God’s but chose our own in Eden. It’s why we’re image obsessed – we want to fix the wound. Ever since that moment, the look of importance can be separated from the substance beneath it. And that’s the paradox: one can either have the look of significance or the significance, itself. And Christ, in gentleness, is trying to tell us that we only have the capacity to choose one.
So which will we choose?
Join us this Sunday for Starbucks at 9:45 and we’ll get into this and a little more besides. Visit our website for directions. I hope to see you there – and I hope you bring someone with you.
CSW
I apologize for the length as it’s a bit longer than I prefer, but it’s also something I feel very strongly about.
It’s easy to wonder why it seems like the path to inner significance is a different journey than the one that leads to outward acclaim. Why aren’t true hero’s making basketball-star-salaries (no offense to the basketball stars)?
It’s easy to wonder why these journeys seem so far apart because we long for them to be the same on such a deep level that it almost seems like we were made for them to be the same. We bandy the phrase, “that’s not fair” as though the very fabric of the universe was offended along with us. And it’s human nature that for as long as these two aspects are kept apart (inner significance and outer acclaim) that even after you’ve chosen one of these paths you may find yourself looking with longing at some aspect of the other journey you could have chosen. It seems like we’re doomed with the tendency to see greener grasses everywhere we look. There was a man who touched on these issues when he said to Jesus in Luke 9.16, “‘I will follow you, Lord; but let me say farewell to those at my home’”. And Jesus’ reply can seem uncharacteristically firm: “No one who puts a hand to the plough and looks back is fit for the Kingdom of God.” Boom. There is no soft appeal clause at the end, no typical “grace” escape, just a difficult admission that the Kingdom does not include a place for “rear view mirror distractions”.
Do you look back? Do you look with longing on some aspects of the other life you could have chosen or could still choose again? I must admit this verse has terrified me for long phases of my journey with Christ. At times I’ve felt like I didn’t just look back, I stared back with intense longing. Not because I regretted anything about Jesus but because I think all of us are prone to the fantasy of “both”: that we could have Christ and the best parts of the other journey, too.
What we are experiencing is nothing more than Eden’s wound. Perfection occurs when we have the inner journey match outer acclaim, when true hero’s are also handsomely rewarded, when those “at the top” also deserve to be there. But that’s what we lost on the way out of the garden – the connection between the two. And for as long as we’re alive, those two paths will be far enough apart that one cannot adequately span the distance between them and keep “one foot on each”.
So I realized recently that heaven is what I really want – or at least the state we will be in once we get there.
I want those two things back in lock step where they belong: the inner and the outer. I want heaven – not the whispy clouds with harp strumming cherubs – I want the journey restored to it’s intended holistic state: work and reward put back in proper ratio’s. I want heaven – I just don’t know it as such. I want the thing twisted into the image of a BMW, a crisp suit and a look of importance, but I want it to be for real. However, I’ve also come to realize that for as long as we’re alive, the image doesn’t contain what’s whispered in it, and image is our problem. We were made in God’s but chose our own in Eden. It’s why we’re image obsessed – we want to fix the wound. Ever since that moment, the look of importance can be separated from the substance beneath it. And that’s the paradox: one can either have the look of significance or the significance, itself. And Christ, in gentleness, is trying to tell us that we only have the capacity to choose one.
So which will we choose?
Join us this Sunday for Starbucks at 9:45 and we’ll get into this and a little more besides. Visit our website for directions. I hope to see you there – and I hope you bring someone with you.
CSW
LAST SUNDAY
Another single sentence to focus on every day as you seek to build an intentional practice of Christianity: “You don’t need to be a hero, you just need to take a step.” You can listen to this message and the rest of the series by visiting our website or subscribing to our podcast..
THIS SUNDAY
In North America, we’re addicted to fossil fuels. As a source of energy, they don’t come much cheaper than simply burning oil or gas. But we’re also finding out that it’s not quite as easy as it once seemed. So what’s the energy source that drives you from the inside and might there be a better “bang for your buck”? Jesus taught about an alternative source of energy. This Sunday, we’ll talk about how to find it.
STARTING SEPTEMBER 10
We’ll be your voice. Help us find the things you long to say to those you live and work beside. Then we’ll start to say them on September 10th. We’ll be announcing more details on Sunday and through the email devotional.
posted by CSW at
10:45 AM
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